This Darkest Man Page 11

  But he didn’t. He drew out at the last second and let his spurts rain down on my hair as I froze. He came on me, covering me in it. I dared not move as he finished, for fear that it could slide down onto my face. I still didn’t move as he swiftly zipped himself up and walked away. He had just reinforced how he felt about me. I was something to be used in his eyes.

  Margaret helped me to my feet and guided me from the room. Once the double doors closed behind us, I shook her grip free and sprinted up the stairs, dying for the safety of the bedroom and the shower to wash away his filth. I scrubbed at my hair, shampooing it time and time again. What a disgusting man. He was vile and cruel.

  Yet he turns you on, Matilda…

  When I finally stepped out from the bathroom, my skin red from the heat, my bedroom was empty. On the bed lay a simple white nightgown and I gave a crazy laugh when I saw it. What a contrast from the slutty slave girl outfit from earlier. This looked like something that a virgin would wear. A girl who would never do the things that I had been forced to do.

  But were you forced, Matilda?

  I slipped the gown on and stared in the mirror. I may have been dressed as a picture of innocence, but there was definitely something dirty about me.

  Chapter Seventeen

  I couldn’t sleep. The noises died down and I assumed that the guests had left. My window looked out on the rear of the house. When I pulled back the heavy velvet drapes, I could see a manicured lawn lit by moonlight, and beyond that stood a hedge maze. I stared at it in wonder. I had been in one as a child and managed to find my way to the center and back again before anyone noticed that I was missing. I made up my mind; I was going in that maze.

  My door wasn’t locked and I slipped through it and down the staircase without coming across anyone. I could hear the chatter of servants, as they must have been cleaning where the party had been held. It wasn’t difficult to locate a door that lead to the rear, and I ran down the stone steps and onto the lawn. The grass was cool beneath my bare feet, but I just ran across it as the maze loomed dark against the night sky. I paused at the entrance, contemplating going back, but then I just went for it. I ran, following the path around twisting corners until I hit a dead end, then turning back and taking another path. It wasn’t long before I hit the center. It was marked by a crumbling stone birdbath and it seemed almost an anti-climax. There should have been treasure there, or something exciting.

  I turned back. Now that I had stopped, I felt the chill on my skin through the thin nightgown. I began to run again to increase the blood circulation, but I kept coming upon dead ends. “Shit!” I swore. I was going to freeze to death in this damn hedge maze and panic started to overcome me.

  “Mattie!” I heard. “Are you in there?”

  “Yes! I’m here,” I cried out desperately. “I’m lost. I can’t find my way out.”

  “Can you make your way to the middle?” Daniel called.

  “I think so,” I yelled back.

  “I’ll meet you there.”

  I took it slowly this time, trying to remember the way that I had come. Before long, that old bird bath was in view and I gave a sigh of relief. A few seconds later, Daniel appeared. He still wore his tuxedo but the tie was loose around his neck.

  He frowned at me. “What the hell were you thinking? Why would you go into a maze in the dark?”

  “I don’t care about the dark,” I told him.

  He gave a nod and his face actually cracked into a smile. “That’s right. It doesn’t scare you, does it?” He removed his jacket and placed it over my shoulders. I smiled at him gratefully; I hadn’t realized how cold I was. He looked down at my bare feet. “You could have at least worn shoes, or proper clothes.”

  “You didn’t give me any.”

  He stared at me then gave a nod. “I guess that I didn’t.”

  I took a step closer to him. “Are you going to despise me forever?” I asked softly, lifting a hand to touch his cheek as he watched me warily. “Will you ever be that man from the farmhouse again?”

  He grabbed my wrist like my touch burned him. “Stop it, Mattie. I’m not that guy, it was just a game. None of it was real. I’m not your fairytale hero. I’m not going to rescue you or turn your life into something good. I’m just a guy who’s sick of his family getting fucked over by yours, and I get off on sexually humiliating you. That’s it. Don’t read more into this than there is.” He still didn’t let go of my wrist, nor move his eyes from mine.

  I gave a laugh. “There’s my answer.” With my free hand I reached over to cup his groin, rubbing it with my hand and feeling him harden.

  “What are you doing, Mattie?” His voice was controlled.

  “Do you only like to fuck in public?” I rubbed in harder.

  “You know that I fuck anywhere, good girl.”

  “Good. Then I want to you to fuck me here while you tell me about yet another atrocity my family has inflicted on yours.” I smirked. “It might help me to cum,” I said lightly.

  He gave a laugh. “Look at you, growing balls finally.” And with that, he roughly shoved me back into the hedge, his hand immediately pushing up my nightdress, baring my thighs, then pussy, all the way up so my breasts were full and hard in the cold air and the moonlight. The hedge roughly scratched my back and bottom, but I didn’t mind. The pain spurred me on.

  I kissed him hard while I freed him from his pants, relishing it as he squeezed at my breasts. He entered my quickly, gripping my bare ass with claw-like hands. I yelped with pain, and then wrapped my legs around him and pulling him even closer to me. “Fuck me,” I whispered into his ear with a raw voice. He pounded me even harder and I cried out, closing my eyes as so many sensations went through me.

  “You want a story?” he grunted. “There once was a girl named Mae, fresh off the boat, no family and friendless, prospects weren’t looking good for Mae. All she had going for her was a pretty face. She got a job as a maid with a certain Mr. Larsen and she thought that things were looking up for her, after all he was the one of the wealthiest men in the area at the time.” His voice shook at he kept thrusting into me. “But unfortunately for poor Mae, her new employer was a depraved individual. He turned Mae into his personal plaything, and she couldn’t go anywhere, she had no money, so she was at the mercy of this Mr. Larsen. And then he married her, that took everyone by surprised, but he’d knocked her up so what could he do? She lost the baby not long after it was born, so not only was she devastated, she was also owned by Mr. Larsen.”

  It was hard to concentrate with the hedge scratching into me and the delicious feeling of being filled completely by Daniel, but I took in his words regardless. “More,” I said in a strangled voice, although I wasn’t sure if I were urging him on to keep screwing me or to keep talking. He did both.

  “Then poor Mae met a young man from the old country. He was handsome and charming, known as a real player. But he wasn’t like that with Mae, he fell in love with her fairly quickly and soon they were talking about running away together. But before that could happen, Mae disappeared. Larsen said she’d left him, but her lover knew that wasn’t true and that he’d done something to her, of course, no one official cared enough to look into it. And the lover turned into a violent drunk. He married a woman he didn’t love and beat her and their children, starting a legacy that had spurned violent drunk after violent drunk in each generation.”

  I came, shaking and jerking to the awful story as he let me down. My mind in a haze of lust with a poor girl trapped in a wall just on the edge of my consciousness. “That’s awful,” I told him when I could speak. Luckily, his hands were on my hips holding me up. “But you’re wrong.”

  “About what?” He sounded like he was struggling to get his voice back.

  “The family wasn’t violent because of anything anyone did. That’s how they chose to be. Look at me? I’m not cruel, and I should be. The people in my life who were supposed to care for me treated me like crap, but I don’t follow their lead.
I’m not like them.”

  He reached up and cupped my face. “Mattie…maybe you should be.”

  I stepped back, away from his reach and shaking my head. “No. I don’t want to be like you people. You think that you can treat every how you like just because you have money and power.” I pulled down my nightdress and pulled his jacket tighter around me, and started walking away.

  He jogged after me. “You may not want to be me, but you certainly want me.” I rolled my eyes at his arrogance, and then looked at him in surprise when he took my hand. “You need me or you’ll get lost, remember?” I wanted to tell him that I already was lost, and that was partly because of him.

  “So, what other things have my family done to yours?” I said instead, following him as he led us around turns in the maze with confidence.

  “That’s a tale for another day.”

  I stopped, pulling back from him but he wouldn’t let go of my hand. “No. You said I could leave tomorrow.”

  He smiled, his teeth glittering in the moonlight. “You can. But it doesn’t mean that I haven’t finished playing with you, Mattie.”

  Before I could speak, he continued pulling me along and I didn’t resist as he led us effortlessly out of the maze. He still did not release my hand as we walked up to the house, and then up the staircase. Once in my bedroom, he closed the door behind us. I stared at him, waiting for him to leave or to speak. But he did neither. Instead, he walked over to me, cupping my face in his hands and kissed me deeply. Instantly, my body responded and my arms went around him. He pulled off his jacket from my shoulders and let it fall to the floor, kissing me all the while. Then he took the thin nightgown in his hands and tore it in two, letting it flutter down to our feet and exposing me in all my nakedness.

  “That’s what I was dying to do in the farmhouse,” he said between kisses, as his teeth nipped at my bottom lip. Then he turned me so we were facing the full-length mirror; him still fully clothed and me naked as he began to kiss my neck. My eyes were glued to our image and I had never believed that I could look as sexy as I did right at that moment.

  “Tell me, what part did you enjoy most about this weekend?” he murmured as he nipped at my neck. My mouth was dry, and part of me wanted to scream that I had enjoyed nothing that he had forced me to endure. But we both knew that that would be a lie. He laughed as I remained silent. “Why are you still so shy around me?” His kissed the base of my throat and it sent a delicious tingle through me.

  He entered me from behind while his hands stroked between my legs. It was a fast and furious coupling that had me cursing as I came while he clutched at my breasts and screwed me hard. Afterward, we both collapsed into the bed. We didn’t cuddle or touch, instead we lay side by side with barely an inch separating us and it was easy to pretend that were different people.

  Chapter Eighteen

  He was gone in the morning and I was left alone in a cold, empty bed in an even colder house. I blinked and tried to remember if what had happened the night before had actually even occurred. Flashes of me trapped in the stocks, being touched by strangers and brought to orgasm by Daniel came back to me. Shame sat at the edge of my mind, but more than that, excitement.

  And now he was gone and disappointment tugged at me. Margaret opened the door without knocking and swept in with a breakfast tray. I pulled the sheet up to cover my nudity as well as the love bites that marked my breasts and neck.

  “Where’s Daniel?” I asked her as she arranged the tray in front of me.

  “He’s gone back to the city. He’s a busy man and can’t play all the time,” she said curtly, her eyes going to the torn nightgown that lay on the floor. She briskly picked it up and oddly I felt embarrassed, although I shouldn’t have, not with everything that had happened.

  “Hurry up and eat your breakfast. You’ll be returned home this morning.” She went to move through the door.

  “Did he leave a message for me?” I called to her, trying to hide the apprehension in my voice.

  She turned to look at me with her stony eyes. “No.” She closed the door behind her, leaving me alone. I couldn’t eat the food. It was frustrating that I was upset that he hadn’t left a message for me; that he had left at all. I shouldn’t have felt like that. He was not a nice man and was upfront about his cruel intentions. Then again, Josh wasn’t a nice man either. Maybe I was one of the women who got off on that kind of thing, I thought with disgust. Still…the memory of having him in my mouth, him using me, sent a spasm of pleasure through my vagina and I found myself rubbing my thighs together to continue that feeling.

  I thrust the tray aside and threw off the sheets so my marked body was visible. My nipples were already hard and when I touched myself between my legs, I found wetness there. I started to stroke myself, remembering the torturous teasing of the night before. Only now I could touch myself and bring myself to that thrilling climax. I let out a low moan as I got closer, squeezing my breasts with one hands while the other rubbed harder at my clit.

  The door opened and I froze. Margaret stood there, looking down at me. “Dear,” she said, “you really are like a bitch on heat, aren’t you?”

  I flushed and pulled the sheet back over me in shame. She gave something that may have been an amused smile as she placed the folded garments on the bed. I couldn’t speak to her, nor did I want to. I just stayed hidden under the sheet until she left. I couldn’t continue after that.

  As promised, I was delivered right to my door in freshly laundered clothes and not a hair out of place. No one would have guessed that I had spent the weekend as little more than a sex slave. As I opened the door to my apartment, I held my breath, hoping for some message from Daniel to be waiting inside for me. But there was nothing.

  It was hard to sleep that night. It was like my body was wired with desire and much of the night was spent with me tossing and turning and trying to bring myself to orgasm. I found that I only could if I fantasized about being watched and humiliated. After I would come down from my climax, then the shame of how dirty and disgusting it was would hit me.

  The next morning, I dragged myself out of bed for work. Even though all I really wanted was to hide in my apartment. Still half asleep, I went into my usual coffee shop for my desperately needed shot of caffeine. They had to call my name three times before I registered that my order was ready. As I made my way up to the counter, I was confronted with the grinning gorgeous face of the sex boy, Colt.

  “Hey, Matilda,” he greeted as he passed me my coffee.

  “Hi,” I mumbled; my hand shaking as I took it. I tried to leave but he gripped my wrist and leaned over to whisper in my ear.

  “You seriously have the best tasting pussy that I’ve ever had,” he whispered in his sexy voice. I felt my cheeks heat and to my horror, tears began to prick in my eyes painfully. He leaned back from me with that cocky grin on his face, then he saw my tears and the grin dropped. “Hey, it’s okay. That was a compliment,” he said softly.

  “I know, I just…” My throat was thick with threatening sobs now.

  “I’m going on my break now,” Colt called to a co-worker, and then he rounded the counter and put his arm around my waist and guided me through a door that led to a storage room. I felt pathetically grateful for being taken away other people. I hated anyone seeing me cry. “Are you okay?” he asked once the door was securely closed. “Sorry, that was stupid thing to say.”

  I shook my head, wiping at my face and feeling slightly more under control. “No, it’s fine. It’s just me. I find this all so…confusing. I shouldn’t like it, but I do.”

  Colt wiped a strand of hair free from my face. “If you enjoy it, then it can’t be bad, right? Just go with it. You’re not doing anything wrong.”

  That was the problem though. It was wrong. I was the victim of a sadistic man and should have been standing my ground and shouting about women’s right and dignity. Instead, I had become his willing toy. Poor, pathetic Matilda.

  “I know.” I stepp
ed back from him. “I’d better get to work.”

  “Okay. Are you sure that you’re gonna be all right?” he asked, concern showing on his face.

  I forced a smile and nodded. “Yeah. I’ll be fine. Thank you, Colt.”

  The grin was back. “You’re welcome, Matilda.”

  I made it just on time to work and could feel my supervisor’s disapproving eyes on me. She seemed to find a lot of fault with my work and I felt myself nearly begin to shake every time she approached me. The day dragged on uneventfully, and so did the rest of the week. There was no word from Daniel, and the sensible part of my brain told me that I should have been feeling relieved that no one would be humiliating me. But it was still my disgusting fantasy as I brought myself to climax each night.

  I spoke to Erin and acted like I was happy. There was no way that I could ever tell her about any of the things that had happened. I couldn’t bear to say it out loud and see her disapproval.

  It was on Friday when the package arrived at my door not long after I had arrived home and kicked off my shoes. The man who delivered it was unsmiling and wore a suit, this was no ordinary deliveryman. The huge box was pale pink with a matching ribbon around it. For a moment, I thought about not opening it, but then I took a breath and pulled at the ribbon and lifted the top off of it.